Monday, February 20, 2012

Mustache Monday: John Waters

Oh gosh. Here we go.

John Waters, famous for his mustache.

John Waters, also famous for directing movies such as Roman Candles, Cry Baby, and the original Hairspray.

My goodness, where to begin? We believe this picture should be in the dictionary next to the word "creeper." If stalking had a face, this would be it. This is the face that tells you you're about to be killed. To be fair, what's a guy to do when society fails to appreciate the God-given beauty of lips? Make them look. Waters was apparently born before the age of botox, and chose a different method of highlighting his luscious lips. Instead of inflating them to balloon size, he decided to outline them with a pencil-thin line. Maybe Waters was hoping Hairspray was actually a brand of Spray-On Hair, and made the movie looking for sponsors because he clearly isn't growing enough of it on his own.

John Waters, the 12th gentleman in our pursuit for the perfect 'stache. Let's see how he did:

Size: 0/5
Style: 0/5
Originality: 2/5
Overall: 2/15

Clearly not a winner. Just, no.

Becca and Kelley

John Waters, self proclaiming his creepiness by playing a cameo role of the Flasher in the new Hairspray. No, we're not kidding. 

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